marisastakenbythesky:

One time I was watching the news and they showed an extremely sped up version of the traffic and the anchor was like “this is a sped up video of the traffic right now” and I was like “no really I thought traffic was going at the speed of light until you said that.”

ugh:

Romney quit squinting ur eyes bitch it ain’t even daylight indoors buddy

marisastakenbythesky:

In middle school I remember sitting in my Italian class and my friend and I overhead these two girls talking..

Girl 1: “What do you wanna be when you grow up?”

Girl 2: “A scientist.”

Girl 1: “Oh, so you’re not gonna have kids?”

Girl 2: “Nope.”

My friend and I: …